SEASONS

Afbeeldingsresultaat voor Beautiful winter pictures
“The peace your eyes reflect, an innocence that betters the man in me”

I’ve been in this winter far too long,

Long enough to know that it’s here to stay.

I’m scared, scared and lonely, scared to tell you the truth.

That my only wish is to walk out of this winter with you.

Scared to tell you that your touch and just your smile,

May rescue me from the cold.

The coldness from the seasons in the past.

So I’ll just keep suffering in silence.

For I’m scared to speak out my heart.

I’m scared that the truth will add yet another winter,

And freeze the tiny pieces that make up what is left of this heart.

So I guess I’ll keep waiting on you in patience, looking at you in secret,

And writing for you with affection.

For I have met monsters and winters phoenix,

Behemoths that flourish in the cold.

Monsters that freeze the life out of our summers,

Beasts that derive happiness and joy

From shivering bodies and tattering teeth of men.

But the innocence I see in your eyes,

Reminds me of beautiful  summers, of goodness and kindness,

Of warmth and happiness, flourishing flowers and morning´s singing birds,

Convinces me that maybe this everlasting winter, will soon end.

And a new summer will dawn upon men.

My only wish is that then, our hearts may beat together.

-SOLOMON-

So the winter seems to be right around the corner. Better start looking for that which will keep you warm. As always, I will remain here hoping that these lines remind you of the beauty is in words. Motivation for this one was A Thousand Light Years too. I hope you enjoyed it.

 

What Writing has taught me about mental health.

Afbeeldingsresultaat voor writing and mental health

First and foremost, thank you for checking in here. It really means alot. (Its a tough industry to thrive in). Secondly, I wanted to make this announcement. I recently started experimenting with poetry (I am no professional writer so bare with me) and text that confronts how I feel. I have this crazy idea in mind. I am going to put all my pieces in a series whose title I am not going to disclose as yet. Its basically a series of poems and text I wrote at one point or the other for someone or for a particular situation. Be sure to subcribe you are posted when this project is done.

Now, mental health. I am no expert when it comes to this issue. But one thing is for sure, in this centuty of ours, its a force to reckon with. I dont want to get into the details of what got me to this point so we shall skip that and dive right into the matter at hand. So basically mental health refers to the state of the brain or the mind or both. I want to focus more on mental health as the state of the MIND. As humans we tend to be haunted by our emotions. Our emotions will control or have a very big influence on the choices we make. Since these emotions are processed by our minds/brains, emotions will surely have one of the most conspicuous effects on our mental health as humans.

If someone asked me to describe 2019 in my own words. I would say it was terrible. I would only call it terrible because my emotions were negatively affected by my situation. And that is a mistake many of us often make. We let our emotions have the bigger say in our decision making processes. Personally, not until recently, I struggled with my emotions. I actually still struggle, only this time, I dont stay folded up, under my blanket. I get up, prepare myself and out to face the world. How did I get to this point, you may ask. One possible theory, maybe, is that I am so used to getting hurt that its starting to feel normal. Its so normal these days that I sometimes can predict where things are going and that I ll end up being hurt. I am simply used to it. The socond and most important theory is the title of this post. WRITING. I have always been a deep person. I am that kind of person one would describe as a modern day Romeo. If I love, I love to deep. If I feel, I feel too deep. And I hate that I was born like this. However, I discovered a philosophy that works. A philosophy that can help put our emotions under control. It is very simple. ACCEPTANCE. I learnt that we simply struggle with emotions because of our failure to accept the negative things going on in our lives. We fail to accept the truth of the situation. From the point your brain accepts your situation, and by accept I mean really accept that something has or is happening, then you will realise that the struggle is less painful and that it is easier to get up and face your situation.

Writing, for me, has been a way of acknowledging my emotions, feelings and situations. Through writing, I have found myself learning to accept and to see the truth in certain things. I denied many things for a long time. I denied the fact that in 2019, people can still be racist. I denied the fact that race actually played a role in people´s perception  of you. I denied the fact that some people will simply never like you no matter how hard you try. It is this denial and failure to acknowledge my feelings that detoriorated my mental health for a long time. And for that matter, I fell down alot, failing to get back on my feet. Through writing, I was able to express my feelings to someone, my paper. My readers. And everytime I read what I wrote, It only sunk in deeper, forcing tme to accept that it actually exists. Writing is only one way of forcing yourself to accept your situation. It worked and still works for me. It is no guarantee that it will work for you. You have to search within yourself, search for that which will force you to accept the truth of your situation.  And when you acknowledge and accept, then you will have a lighter battle to fight.

In conclusion, I am not saying that I am now okay. The fact that life is not a constant, the uncertainity of tomorrow´s happenings means that our mental health is in one way or the other subject to our situation. However, it is how you handle and process your emotions that determines how good or how bad  your mental health will be. My 2019 has been terrible. I have however learnt more than I have my whole entire life. Today, I am a stronger healthier person thanks to all the negativity I have had to deal with. I hope to get my poetry project to a bigger audience, and even if I did not, even if people didnt like it, I wouldnt mind! I wouldnt mind because I only write to pour out my heart on paper.

 

Shouting Heart

Afbeeldingsresultaat voor I love you a thousand different ways

I wish we spoke the same language. The language the free birds sing on those cold lonely mornings. I wish our tongues were one and the same. That you could get lost in my eyes. Eyes that see stars in yours. For my face is of stone, dry and rugged, quiet as the still oceans at dawn. But my heart is clean. My heart is shouting. Waiting on you to hear these words, That I love you a thousand different ways.

SOLOMON

The Inspiration behind this piece is same as that of A Thousand Light Years

There are things you really want to tell someone but just dont know where to start. Anyway, I remain hoping that these words may say the things my heart wants to say

I wrote this piece too  for all those who feel deeply. Those that believe in true love. Never stop loving, no matter what you have been through. Keep believing. Just keep living. Someone is writing their chapter in your book just like I sit here writing my songs. Just wait till the end. And keep loving.

 

MILES AWAY

Image result for a quiet lonely soul

“Miles away,

A quiet lonely soul was smiling

With love hidden deep, which was never expressed!

But with tons of affection in the eyes, took care of its love.

And when recognised, it was late enough to hurt,

But never late to make a smile resembling the love

in her curvy lips”

                                                                      – Anonymous-

I came across this peace on the Internet a while ago. I dont know the author but What I do know is that it is simply amazing.

Image result for a peaceful place

A Thousand Light Years

 

Afbeeldingsresultaat voor BEAUTIFUL ROSES 4K images

‘Of blue eyes and tender skin’,

An innocence that puts my demons to sleep.

Demons that keep me up all night.

Of rosy lips and silky hair,

Eyes that manifest my every fear,

Fear that eats up my lost broken soul.

Of GRACEFUL nature and NOBLE character,

Beauty that awakens my deepest desires.

Desires that weaken my shattered heart.

Of exquisite form and flowing lines,

Anatomy that tears up my eyes.

Tears I cried in the darkest of places.

Tell me, ‘Of blue eyes and tender skin’,

Did our paths just cross each other?

Will our paths ever cross each other?

Or are we just a thousand light years apart?

SOLOMON

Afbeeldingsresultaat voor BEAUTIFUL ROSES 4K images

For I wake up, only to die again

 

Afbeeldingsresultaat voor void

I died the day I met you, I died the day I fell in love with you and I´ve been dead a while now. And yet, you kill me everyday. You kill me every moment our eyes meet. You kill me with the hate I see. The hate I see in your eyes. You never commited a murder, I committed a suicide. It was not worth it. It simply wasn´t. I died for a bootless errand. I remain in the darkness, in a vacuum, an empty deserted void. Just me and my quiver full of arrows. Arrows that punctured my every self. Either way, the sun sets, only to rise again. And I wake up, just in time to die again. 

SOLOMON

So I came up with this piece this evening. It was originally meant to be a short poem ( Ive just started experimenting with poetry so please understand ) but since I have no poem editing tools, I just decided to make it a short text. I hope you loved it.

Constellation of Failed Affections

Afbeeldingsresultaat voor beautiful constellation

I raise my head at dawn 

To wonder at the sky.

The beautiful sky.

A constellation so stunning,

Yet only reflects my wounded being.

I see myself at dawn as that forlon star.

In harmony with majority, but forsaken by  the one that really matters.

And so I see myself at dawn, a dejected entity.

For this is my constellation,

My constellation of failed affections.

SOLOMON

PS; This is my first attempt at poetry. I hope you loved it. Many more are along the way.

TIME AND TIDE WAIT FOR NO MAN

Afbeeldingsresultaat voor IMAGES RELATED TO HUMAN EMOTIONAL STRUGGLE

So for a while now, I’ve been trying to figure out a couple of things! And last night, over a few drinks( I never get drunk, just saying ), It hit me. Quarter life crisis! I understand that for many of you thats not a thing, but it actually is! I cant quite explain it clearly but I think it feels more like turning 40 at 20. Humanity is subject to time. Our very own existance is answerable to time irrespective of status, material belonging and so forth. We are born into this world with nothing and are bound to leave with nothing at one point in time. And for this reason, we are scared. We are scared of what will happen when that time comes. Is there life after death? Do we reincarnate? Does it all end there? The fact that our time here is limited coupled with the uncertainity that comes with our “end” tunes our brains to think a certain way. The rise of these crises! Quarter Life Crisis (QLC)-funny fact, I thought I had concocted a new term only to discover that it actually already existed.

So we are born, grow up happy and get to a point where we simply dont understand what we have been doing all this time or even what we are going to do for the rest of our time. Depression, Loneliness, Hopelessness all start kicking in. We get lost. Lost in ourselves. With millions of questions running through our minds. Why me? Its all overwhelming! There is nothing sadder that one having to ask themselves, “What is wrong with me?”. As a victim, I discoverd a secret. A weapon like no other! A mentality to move forward. A mindset to steer you where  you want to be. It is simple. These Crises are nature´s way of giving us time. Giving us time to take a step back and think. Think and meditate deeply about meaning and purpose. This is time we get to grow. Not physically but emotionally and spiritually. Negative feelings in our lives should not put us down. They should be a source of motivation. Motivation to archive things we only dream about. It should push us forward. “Every cloud has a silver lining”, is not a saying thats very easy to believe most especially if your cloud is a cumulo-nimbus one!!( see what I just did right there?) Point is, its a battle we have to strive to beat. And we can only beat it by seeking the hidden motivation in such situations.

My crisis is simply a lack of achievement. A lack of achievement not in the big things like academics and so fourth but rather in the small things. Matters of the heart. Its that nasty feeling of giving your all, and getting nothing in return. Being the nicest version of yourself, and end up being hated. And baring in mind that time waits for no man, the crisis becomes more pronounced. Maybe hatred is too big a word but its that shortage of reciprocated love that best describes my crisis. But this is only an example. Your crisis could be triggered and best described by something totally different. And to be honest, Its a very bad feeling. Untill recently, I took it for granted. I never knew that matters of the heart could way a whole human down. I literally almost collapsed. And why? That feeling of rejection. That simple.

The big question though, is, What now? What then? This where the secret weapon comes in. Taking time off, looking for the silver lining in your cloud, deriving motivation from it, and pushing forward. When your enemy ( in this case your situation ) sees you waking up every day stronger than before, Trust me, It kills them inside. Even if you fake it. It still has a lasting effect on what you can archieve in the long run. Dont let your crisis weigh you down. Dont give your foes the opportunity to see you down. And everytime you feel down in your crisis, remember that you only feel like that because you are not dead. And that only means that the fact that you are alive is giving you time to catch up on all these shortcomings in your life. Succes, Family, Love, Frienships and Life in general. So keep fighting, and in the end, you will look back and remember a battle well fought and a lesson well learnt.

Afbeeldingsresultaat voor IMAGES RELATED TO HUMAN EMOTIONAL STRUGGLE

“Strength comes from struggle. When you learn to see your struggles as opportunities to become stronger, better, wiser, then your thinking shifts from ‘I can’t do this’ to ‘I must do this.”

Toni Sorenson

 

SHAPE OF WATER

Image result for BEAUTIFUL ICE FLAKES

I’ve honestly never considered Pseudoscience as an actual branch of science. It is however interesting that one of my favourite Scientists and Scientific Theories hail from this branch. Masaru Emoto ( Rest In Peace ), a Japanese Pseudo-scientist theorised that Positive thoughts and words have an effect on the molecular shape of water! Interesting. Honestly, as a science lover, that is the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. Recently, I sat down and thought deeply about that statement. Emoto actually carried out experiments to come to this conclusion!! Water was put in reaction vessels and frozen so as to observe the ice particles clearly with microscopic material. Two vessels were involved. One was exposed to a crowd with people thinking positive things and the other to a crowd of negativity. Apparently and according to Emoto, the results when viewed under a microscope after the experiment were interesting. The Ice flakes from the positivity crowd were more “appeasing” to look at than those from the negativity crowd.

When I thought about this whole story clearly, a number of questions run through my brain. Why would anyone, an intelligent man at that, go through all the trouble to prove such a ridiculous theory? And then it hit me! THE POWER OF OPTIMISM. Truth be told, I am a very pessimistic person. I have always been. I will have a plan A, a plan B for the plan A, a plan C for the plan B of the plan A and so forth. Over the years, my pessimism has only been getting worse and worse. Emoto was not stupid. He was trying to show the power of positive thinking. The power of being hopeful that in the middle of your storm, whatever it is, something good is coming your way. For something to change the molecular shape of anything, It should have a certain degree of strength. Just like what happens when you heat Calcium Carbonate. It will thermally decompose until you have Calcium oxide and carbon dioxide. The heat is strong enough to get a gas out of a pure solid! That is how much power your thoughts have over you. Your thoughts will determine what you do and how you do it.

A few days ago I read an interesting story about a young man in Bangladesh. Life was good until one morning he felt a “silly” pain in his left shoulder. When he went to the hospital, he was referred to do a number of tests, X-Rays, CT scans, etc…. and 10 days later he received news that changed his life forever. He was diagnosed with bone cancer! Oesteoblastoma! To make things worse, it had spread to other areas of the upper body! Now, imagine what that feels like? I then went on to read another story of a Young man who lost his whole family ( Mother, father, wife, and two kids) in just one accident! Where then does one get the strength to live in such incidents? It is stories like these that put life into perspective for me. If you ever feel like you are in the middle of worst storm of your life, think about such cases! Both these people are alive today. They have redefined their purpose to live. And they didn’t do that, by being negative about their situation. Instead,they took time off to think, to look for purpose. they were optimistic. They surrounded themselves with Positivity, with positive people.

That is a life lesson. You have to detach yourself from negativity. From people who make you feel bad about yourself. You would rather fight a storm alone than in a boat filled with negative minds, with minds that don’t encourage you to move forward, to stand your ground. Positivity will steer you in the right direction. As I mentioned earlier, I am a very pessimistic person. I struggle to be positive. I struggle to feel good about myself, to identify. But at least I am trying. And you too ought because it works. It does work. I’ve not achieved a milestone or something of the sort, but I’m where I am because I believe there is something good out there waiting for me. There is something amazing out there waiting for YOU. You just need to believe and steer yourself, your mind, your thoughts and your being in that direction.

lake near forest

“If you feel lost, hesitant, disappointed, or weak, return to yourself, to who you you are, here and now and when you get there, you will discover yourself, like a lotus flower in full bloom; even in a muddy pond, beautiful and strong!”

-MASARU EMOTO-